By now, we realize that tattoos are mainstream. They're not just for truckers and Hell's Angels.

Tats are cool.

Moms are letting the world know we are proud to be parents and getting inked up with our kid's names.

Moms with tats are waaaaaay cool.

Check out these celeb moms and their kiddie tats:

Heidi Klum has her husband, Seal's name and the first initial of her children on her forearm.

Julia Roberts has the name of her 3 children on her lower back.

Angelina Jolie has the geographical coordinates where her children were born or where she adopted them.

...and a host of others, all very meaningful to her. AJ rocks!

Victoria Beckham surprisingly has many tattoos with various meanings. She has hubby, David Beckham's initials on left wrist; five stars representing herself, her three sons, and her husband, on lower back; Hebrew text, from the Song of Songs, "I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine," on neck and upper back, and the date she and her husband first had sex on her wrist.

When I was a freshman in college, I got my first tattoo....it hurt.

A couple months later, I pierced my upper right ear lobe....it hurt.

About a year after that, I pierced my navel....it hurt.

Notice a pattern?

Finally, I discovered the joys of shopping and my rebellious stage ended.

Speaking of shopping, the other day I decided I deserved a new necklace and ventured to a local jewelry store. As I admire the  baubles and trinkets in the window, I am subliminally beckoned towards a colorful yet classy storefront....hmm, a tattoo place.

It caught my eye because my neighborhood is pretty cookie cutter, entertainment industry professionals or white pickett fence families. I'm basically the riff-raff of my hood.

I wander in and meet Howard Teman. I have no idea I'm talking to a guy that has tatted numerous rockers and celebs. He graciously answers all my questions and even tries to entertain Bronson with the tattoo needles. Just kidding....about the needles.

I had been wanting to get a tattoo for a while and after chatting with Howard, he made me feel really comfortable and patiently helped create just what I wanted. Besides, a tattoo was much cheaper than a diamond pendant.

So, here's the deal. It had been about 12 years since I last got a tattoo. I figured in that time span, surely modern technology had revolutionized the tattoo industry and it was now a painfree procedure. I watched as a young female was relaxing while Howard finished up her 3 hour long tattoo that covered half her lower back. She didn't have a complaint in the world. She happily invited me over to admire her new tat. It was cool.

My turn. So far the procedure was still the same.

-pick your design

-stencil it onto your body (sort of like those wash off tats kids get at birthday parties)

-fill it in with the permanent ink (and needle)

Easy enough. Howard showed me the new needle and sterile equipment. He throws some James Brown on (because I said I wanted to hear somthing funky, ok, I was thinking more along the lines of Snoop, but whatever). Then it happens....I realize modern technology has not changed a dayum thing with the pain of the needle. It probably doesn't help that I chose the wrist, the body part loaded with sensitive nerves.

I instantly wonder how the previous customer sat through 3 hours of this...oh, I'm later informed she took 2 Vicodin prior....NICE. Where's my painkillers?!!? Luckily I pop an Alleve that my sister had. More for peace of mind, because in that short time span, it really didn't do jack. lol

Nonetheless, Howard is great assuring me that I'm doing well and earns extra points with me when he says "women definitely take the pain better than men....especially moms." Oh yeah!!

Finally we're done. Here's the finished product:

I'm not in the Mob. It says "Mo" and "B"-the nicknames for my sons.

Howard is making sure my pimp smack reflex isn't activated.

The artist at work.

OOOOOH....I told ya'll it hurt. Some places more than others. Forgot about the ulna and radial nerves. 8 years in the medical profession for nothing!

If you're in Cali, make sure you go see Howard. He's funny, nice, has great prices, lets you pick your own music to relax to, doesn't moan and grown if you change your tat design/font a zillion times....and didn't call me a crybaby not once!

Here's some Friday morning handsome to kick your weekend off.

My boy Bronson....always happy as long as he's eating or drinking.

People love dogs.

People in LA LOOOOOVE dogs.

It's not just Paris Hilton or something you see in movies. LA people really love their dogs as if they were their first born child.

Jesse James and wife actress Sandra Bullock recently lost their 9 month old Pitbull, Cinnabun. The couple offered a $2,000 reward that was later incresed to $5,000 for her safe return. They also enlisted the help of a pet finders, Find Toto, to help. Think of this group as an Amber Alert for animals.

Jesse tweated about their missing dog and got over 17,000 responses.

After "Cinny" had been missing for a little over 3 weeks, she was returned by a stranger to his bike shop, West Coast Choppers. 

I only speak on this because when I first moved to LA 11 years ago, I couldn't believe the human attraction to dogs here. I thought it merely another one of those cliche Los Angeles things like men over 45 marrying a 20 something yoga instructor.

I would huff and puff each time I saw an Angeleno exchange saliva with their little Fe-Fe or tote little Snookum around the mall in a rhinestone sweater and 14K pooch collar via a designer carrier. It was quite funny.

Then...a few years later I got a dog.

I have never been a "dog person".

In fact I really don't like dogs. I only liked mine.

I actually get annoyed when people's dogs come up to me and sniff, lick, stare at me. BUT, I loved my sweet Buster. And as I bonded with my gentle giant, I quickly understood the magical connection between man and dog.When he died some years ago, I cried my eyes out. I even got a new watch to help ease the pain and take my mind off the loss of my buddy, but it only helped for a day or 2. The Cartier powers that be could not mask my devotion to dear Buster.

I couldn't believe how attached I was to my 4 legged friend.

Some people chastised Jesse and Sandra for offering a $5,000 reward and their massive efforts to retrieve their lost pup. I totally understand that you can't put a price on happiness. Congrats to Jesse and Sandra for the safe return of their  "baby".

Now, don't get me wrong. I still don't like dogs, if one of those annoying yappy pups comes up to me while I'm eating a salad at a cafe, I'll probably kick it or talk about the owner when they leave. But I really am happy for Jesse and Sandra.

Buster with 10 month old Mo

What a sweet face!!! I still miss my Buster.

Sometimes going to extreme measures with kids is necessary. On occasion, simple answers carry very little weight. Kids need a detailed dramatic picture to get through their hard heads.

Example:

Me: Mo, please don't put those legos in your mouth.

Mo: Why?

Me: Because I asked you not to....(he takes it out but does it again 2 minutes later)

Me: Mo, please don't put those legos in your mouth.

Mo: Why?

Me: I don't want you to choke...(he takes it out but does it again 2 minutes later)

Me: Mo, please don't put those legos in your mouth.

Mo: Why?

Me: Because they can get stuck in your throat, close off your esophagus, put a strain on your bronchial tubes, then I have to call 911, find a babysitter for your brother while we rush you to the hospital, spend hours driving in circles trying to find a parking place. Then you will have to get numerous painful shots, you will probably start bleeding, blood will gush out everywhere, ruining your new favorite Star Wars shirt, get all gross in your hair, we'd have to wash your hair (and I know how much you hate that) and you could DIE!!!!!!

He spits the legos out and hasn't put one in his mouth since.

Sometimes you have to go to extreme measures. 

Happy Valentines's Day!

I turned my back for a minute (how many times have you heard that one) and Bronson grabbed a box of chocolates from the counter and went to town!

This is pretty good.

Let me try another one.

Just one more

Mommy's not even looking...hee hee.

Uh-oh. Busted.

Best dinner ever! Thanks mom.

"When you are in Love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams."-Dr. Seuss

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.
-Helen Keller

Happy Valentine's Day.

Since I have 2 boys, people are always asking if they have similar personalities. Yes and no.

They are both Gemini. They have a 4 year age difference, but their birthdays are 2 weeks apart.

The easiest way to put it into perspective is this:

Mo (Morris) has the same bday as Naomi Campbell.

B (Bronson) has the same bday as Angelina Jolie.

Mo: Very intense and emotional. He's meticulous and an extreme perfectionist. He is ultra competitive in everything he does and doesn't like to be 2nd best in anything. When he's happy, it's almost as if he's drunk. When he's angry, his jugular vein bulges. He needs attention, but doesn't neccesarily have to be the center of attention at gatherings. He has a quiet confidence and always surveys a situation or circumstance before taking action. Gets bored easily, especially when he's not challenged. He's very protective of people he loves and has a passion for fighting and being physical, although he is rarely the aggressor. Loves the ladies, girls, females, etc...

B: Very carefree and laid back. He adapts well to change and goes along for the ride easily. He loves to laugh and play, often times just by himself. He is extremely independent and does the best when he's just left alone to do his own thing. His favorite activity is eating. He always has food in his hand or mouth. He loves to laugh and thinks everything is funny. He will sit down quietly and read books or do puzzles. He has a pretty good attention span and doesn't get bored with repetivie tasks. Very sweet, fun loving, and happy among loved ones, but cautious and quiet around unfamiliar faces.

We'll see what happens over the next few years. Otherwise, I'm content with my little Naomi and little Angelina. :-)

When Morris was in preschool, some parents put together a laminated placemat as an end of year momento for the students. Even though Morris has parted from his preschool comrades, he still enjoys using the placemat at mealtime.

One night at dinner he requested it and was occupied so nicely having "conversations" with all his buddies.

Look at all the nice smiling faces from Mo's preschool days.

Little did I know what my "sweet" Mo was up to.

The school owner and teachers got a heavy dose of Mo's artistic skills.

Teacher Carolyn was spared "because she likes Brett Favre." (That's my boy!)

No mercy!

At least he's loyal. No Sharpie makeover for himself or his preschool girlfriends, Samantha and Devin.

One thing I'm learning about having 2 kids is all about sibling relationships. Morris and Bronson are 4 years apart. They want to play with each other,  but sometimes it's hard for a 5 year old to communicate with a 1 year old and vice versa.

I'm learning the fine line of parental intervention and when to just let them "work it out". I don't want Morris to feel that I'm always taking Bronson's side then Mo feels alienated and like I chose "the baby" over him. At the same time, I don't want to teach Bronson to be passive and feel like I'm gonna always step in and save him when there's an altercation.

So lately, I've just been sitting back and watching how things play out and intervene at the last minute as a last solution.

Mo: Look at my cool R2D2.

Bronson: Hmm...what's my brother have? Looks kind of interesting. I'm gonna check it out.

Bronson: Oh yeah, that's cool. I sure wish I could play with it...

Mo: I said "NO" you little shit. Buzz off.

Mo: Beat it Bronson.

Bronson: Ok, fine, if you're not gonna show me how R2D2 works, I'll just read my books.

Mo: Ok, fine, it has a remote control that makes it work...

Mo: Then, R2D2 starts moving and talking...

Bronson: I don't get it...lemme just get a little closer.

Mo: That's too close little brother. Back it up.

Mo: You got too close bro.

Bronson: Just lemme see the remote then...please...

Mo: This kid is annoying.

Mo: When are you gonna get it through your thick head...

Bronson: When are you gonna get it through your thick head...

Mo: I'm gonna have to show him who the BIG BROTHER is around these parts.

Mo: I'm locking R2D2 in the bathroom. Now, scram half-pint.

Mo: Lie down and take a nap.

Bronson: Don't do that brother...I'm warning ya.

Mo: OUCH! Ok, fine you can see R2D2

Bronson: I warned ya.

Sometimes, situations just have a way of working themselves out.

One of my favorite days of the week is Friday. Not for TGIF, but because it's the day I volunteer in Mo's Kindergarten classroom. I have been doing reading with all the kids. They read 2 or 3 books to me and I reward them with stickers on the reading chart. It's lots of fun.

Well, one day, the teacher decided to put me on arts and crafts. I was a little nervous, because this has never been my area of expertise. Pretty much throughout my lifetime my artwork has always looked like a Kindergartner did it. But, I gave it a shot. 

I failed. I got a big fat "F". 

I was supposed to be making Freedom Buses with the kids. And the first order of business was to demonstrate the steps by drawing a bus on the dry erase board. It was going really well until I realized that instead of using the designated dry erase marker, I used a Sharpie. Oopsie.

I hung my head low and took the evidence of my carelessness home with the intent of purchasing a new one for the class. 

Then, after griping about it on facebook, another mom told me there is a magic solution to get it out. Apparently I'm not the first idiot to do this!!!! So, here is the remedy to remove sharpie marker from a dry erase board (not that I'm implying any of you would do this):

1. Go over the Sharpie marks with a dry erase marker. Make sure you cover completely. Let it sit for 1-2 minutes.

2. Say "mamasay mamasou maknocku sigh" 3x

3. Drop to the floor and do the worm

4. PRESTO! Wipe it off. It comes off.

5. You might need to repeat the process. This really works.

BEFORE

AFTER!