A Hot Mama

I have Trichoptilosis. You don’t have to avoid me, you probably have it too.

I love watching beauty pageants and they ask the contestants,

“Miss Happy Liberty County, if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be and why?”

MLC: I wouldn’t change anything about myself because this is the way that God made me, and God never makes mistakes. And God Bless America.

I always chuckle because ever since I was a kid, I’ve had bad teeth and split ends. Not sure if this is from bad genes or bad hygeine.

Don’t think I’m gross. I do brush my teeth and wash my hair (eventually). BUT, I also love to eat candy and pick my split ends. So, if I ever decide to enter the “Ms. I Have Kids and Don’t Give a Crap” Pageant, rest assured what my answer will be to that question.

I pick my split ends so much, that on a rare occasion when I get a haircut, I immediately start sifting through my newly trimmed locks looking for some breakage.  It’s like I’m dependent on my broom bristle ends. I don’t know why it’s so frickin fun and appealing to pull apart all the tiny little v-shaped hairs.

Once, I found a hair that had split into so many little tears it looked like a centipede. I got so excited. I don’t know why because I hate bugs (ewww….just looking at that picture makes me cringe). I even called my friend and told her about it, because this was much too exciting to keep to myself. She told me I was “gross” and hung up.

I’ve realized the only cure for Trichoptilosis (split ends) is to have them cut. But here  are some tips for prevention.

1. Get your hair trimmed regularly, meaning every six to eight weeks. Yeah, this one doesn’t work well for me. I’m lucky if I can wash my hair every six to eight days, much less try to make it to a salon for a cut.

2. Wear a hat. If your hair is super long and/or thick, be sure to get a hat that you will be able to fit all your hair into (preferably in a bun). Ok, my son already thinks I am so uncool and tells me I need to wear a pretty dress everyday, donning a big straw hat with my librarian bun stuffed in it will totally kill my chances at climbing his PreK cool factor ladder.

3. Find out if the water you use to wash your hair is harmful. I am the one in the restaurant that puts a lemon in my beverage of choice, tap water. If it’s good enough to drink, my hair should approve.

So, it looks like me and my split ends are stuck together for a while.

***Please note, this blog entry took me over an hour to complete due to my frequent breaks to pick my split ends. I must have started and stopped my train of thought at least 30 times.